In my last workplace, there was an assigned "sunshine coordinator" whose job it was to arrange bday cake and condolence flowers and the like. (In addition to their other "real" duties.) When the (female) secretary who had been handling it was promoted into another division, nobody volunteered to take over. Eventually, the managers had us anonymously nominate each other on little slips of paper in a jar. I was a few weeks off from giving notice--my partner was interviewing for jobs in other cities--so I wrote down the names of every man in the unit and submitted all of them.
Yep, I'm part of a team at my job that is totally voluntary but we try to get people more involved with each other and create a good atmosphere and just generally bring good vibes and its hard for a lot of reasons but its also frustrating because its all women and we get complaints from people (usually men) that nothing we do is ever what they would enjoy and its like, then join us!! volunteer!! its a 30 minute meeting every week or 2!! if you're not going to do the work you don't get to be a jerk when what's done isn't done like you want.
Remember Miss Manners? Back in the eighties she was decrying the modern trend toward mandatory office holiday fun, not so much because women had to arrange all of it but just on "this is a business place, we're not family" grounds. I think she was marking the arrival of the neoliberal "we're family" workplace where your home is your cube...
This was a government office, and we were the only unit to be anywhere near that organized. We paid for it ourselves: each person pitched in $2 each pay period.
Honestly, it was lovely. There was still a culture of good work/ life balance, and we all generally liked each other and felt part of a team
Speaking of sunshine coordinators... I just joined a place where there's a "sunshine fund" that folks of my job title have. They put in $10 a year and it's mostly for cards, flowers, or donations for births/deaths in the family/get well etc. The sticking point for me is that it also goes towards a holiday gift for the head of the division we work for and their office. I'm perfectly fine with the gifts to the colleagues on a horizontal level but on principle don't do gifts flowing up. I've been here three weeks and whatever my reply to this email is will be my first interaction with most of the group. What would you do?
Woof. That's really hard. There is a strict do not gift up rule in the universe, but there's also a don't rock the boat in a new job rule. Do you have an HR office?
It seems to be truly optional, so I don't think it's worth going to them over. I'm thinking I'll just contribute (since the majority of the money goes to people I'm happy for it to go to) and find an opportunity to say something once I've gotten to know people better. I'm just especially resentful after once getting pressured into contributing to the birthday gift of a boss who clearly paid for his lake house by keeping our wages low! I'm not a scotch drinker but when he opened up the gift and offered folks a glass I said absolutely.
Nicole, thank you for the nudge to read the Tina Turner profile. I don't know why I waited so long; I've been a fan of hers since before her eighties comeback, which if you knew her work at all was especially thrilling to watch. It's so gratifying to see that she's lived an excellent life since then, and now that I'm mostly retired, I have a new role model.
Re: who does the party planning--
In my last workplace, there was an assigned "sunshine coordinator" whose job it was to arrange bday cake and condolence flowers and the like. (In addition to their other "real" duties.) When the (female) secretary who had been handling it was promoted into another division, nobody volunteered to take over. Eventually, the managers had us anonymously nominate each other on little slips of paper in a jar. I was a few weeks off from giving notice--my partner was interviewing for jobs in other cities--so I wrote down the names of every man in the unit and submitted all of them.
Yep, I'm part of a team at my job that is totally voluntary but we try to get people more involved with each other and create a good atmosphere and just generally bring good vibes and its hard for a lot of reasons but its also frustrating because its all women and we get complaints from people (usually men) that nothing we do is ever what they would enjoy and its like, then join us!! volunteer!! its a 30 minute meeting every week or 2!! if you're not going to do the work you don't get to be a jerk when what's done isn't done like you want.
Remember Miss Manners? Back in the eighties she was decrying the modern trend toward mandatory office holiday fun, not so much because women had to arrange all of it but just on "this is a business place, we're not family" grounds. I think she was marking the arrival of the neoliberal "we're family" workplace where your home is your cube...
This was a government office, and we were the only unit to be anywhere near that organized. We paid for it ourselves: each person pitched in $2 each pay period.
Honestly, it was lovely. There was still a culture of good work/ life balance, and we all generally liked each other and felt part of a team
Speaking of sunshine coordinators... I just joined a place where there's a "sunshine fund" that folks of my job title have. They put in $10 a year and it's mostly for cards, flowers, or donations for births/deaths in the family/get well etc. The sticking point for me is that it also goes towards a holiday gift for the head of the division we work for and their office. I'm perfectly fine with the gifts to the colleagues on a horizontal level but on principle don't do gifts flowing up. I've been here three weeks and whatever my reply to this email is will be my first interaction with most of the group. What would you do?
Woof. That's really hard. There is a strict do not gift up rule in the universe, but there's also a don't rock the boat in a new job rule. Do you have an HR office?
It seems to be truly optional, so I don't think it's worth going to them over. I'm thinking I'll just contribute (since the majority of the money goes to people I'm happy for it to go to) and find an opportunity to say something once I've gotten to know people better. I'm just especially resentful after once getting pressured into contributing to the birthday gift of a boss who clearly paid for his lake house by keeping our wages low! I'm not a scotch drinker but when he opened up the gift and offered folks a glass I said absolutely.
Nicole, thank you for the nudge to read the Tina Turner profile. I don't know why I waited so long; I've been a fan of hers since before her eighties comeback, which if you knew her work at all was especially thrilling to watch. It's so gratifying to see that she's lived an excellent life since then, and now that I'm mostly retired, I have a new role model.