Today I am going to watch “My Fair Lady”. Steve fell asleep at 8:30 and I read two complete true crime books between then and midnight and need to do a hard reset.
good reset is good. (I love Audrey Hepburn and will hear nothing against her, but. if I suddenly got a time machine, one of the things I would do first is go back and see Julie Andrews in the original Broadway production.)
Thank you for linking to your C&F column because HOLY SHIT how clueless are those parents who move TWICE A YEAR FOR THE HUSBAND'S JOB?! Were they a child before they had 4+ of them?! The cheery tone of "what can I do to negate the effects". Honey. STAHHHP.
(as for the husband... I would bet good money there is a whoooole can of controlling worms under there).
And it "wouldn't be good" for THE HUSBAND to change this arrangement...?! 1 husband v 4 kids + 1 wife... I've only been a parent for a short time but to me those sums do themselves...
Thank you for your answer to that one, Nicole. It sounded so similar to my childhood that I genuinely wondered if the dad was in the same industry as my dad. We did not move QUITE as much (I'd been to 6 schools by 6th grade, including the same school twice, because I went to the same school for 3rd and 5th grades but a different one for 4th!!) but it's still something that throws the occasional hitch in my personality. (My newsletter last week was an essay on my weird fantasy of getting really into dollhouse construction so I can re-create all the houses I briefly thought were my home! very normal!)
Also none of us kids talk to our dad anymore, which is not BECAUSE of the moving, directly, but it's a third variable problem (his narcissism.) Sorry to get very personal in the comments here, but that letter really affected me and I'm really, really glad you set that mom straight!!!
Anyhoodle. I have a slight sore throat but we have been social distancing for 2+ weeks over here so (a) hopefully it's not Covid19 and (b) if it is hopefully I haven't infected anyone else. Including the baby. Argh. It'll be grand.
Stahhhp indeed! My parents moved from one school district to another the summer between my 3rd and 4th grade. It was awful going from knowing everyone in my class to being the New Kid. I can't imagine the issues those poor kids have with moving twice a year. Dear sweet Pete on a pogostick! Pick a central location and stay!
My mom was an Army Brat and she was just happy she got to stay in one place for all of high school. I moved exactly once from suburban DC to small town CT in middle school and I still feel weird talking about how devastating it was for me. Inside Out is v on point.
Stop moving the kids is what I'm saying that is SO much moving. Also what company? The only one I can think of that does that is IBM and even then I think it's like one international placement for a few years.
Hey friends. I’ve been going through some life events and I would kind of like to throw some of my stress into the ether of internet community and love.
My husband and I separated in August. We have separate apartments but are still theoretically trying to make things work. The year before we separated was really hard, escalating in yelling most nights. This really took a toll on me and I’m starting to feel like myself again finally. But when we see each other now it almost always ends in a fight or hurt feelings. I am finding it difficult to apologize even if I know it’s warranted because so much of that bad year had to do with the idea that I was doing everything wrong and I feel like I’m retroactively validating it. I am exhausted, and as an avid follower of r/rels I know that if I were reading this I would basically be like “get outta there girl” but I am finding that so much harder in practice. Now with Covid and quarantine it’s highlighting how much we still depend on each other for social interaction and emotional support but also realizing that the support I think is there doesn’t really exist in practice anyway. I am le tired.
Thanks for letting me share, and any good thoughts, vibes, or incantations are welcome. Love to you all.
The neighborhood listserv is starting to accumulate prayer requests for infected family members in critical condition. :( So far it seems like everyone has a ventilator available to them but it's going to get very ugly. I would dearly appreciate any prayers you can offer for my community.
the letter about the sex ed is. A Lot. and reminds me of so I was around that age during the Clinton scandal and I have a VERY strong memory of my mom asking me if I knew what Oral Sex was and a MORTIFIED me lying and said I did just to end that conversation. (I thought it was phone sex).
Other family sex ed highlights include my mom presenting me (also around this age) with a copy of Our Bodies Ourselves and talking about how important it was to her and to let her know if I had any questions. I love my mom but she is a very blunt person.
When I was nine or so, Mom attempted to have the Talk with me. I looked her in the eye and said, "I'm too young for this."
She left a copy of "What's Happening to My Body" on my bed for me to find instead. We never spoke of anything related to puberty or sex again. (In retrospect, I know that Mom got hit with puberty much younger than I did, and she probably was sure that tampon explanations and bra shopping were right around the corner.)
Nicky, your sign-offs always give me a pep in my step that I need. Also, it feels odd to call you Nicky. I've spent so much time telling my husband "My internet friend Nicole told me to buy [item from Sephora]."
Nicole yesterday my entire local family (mom, husband, grandparents, great aunt, regular aunt and uncle, both cousins) asked me to lead a conversation about last wishes and deciding who is the designated visitor if someone ends up hospitalized. It was my first day off in a month of responding to this nightmare and I spent an hour and a half on a call planning how everyone wants to die.
Your newsletter is a light in this dark timeline, so thank you for that. And I could use a lot of virtual hugs.
One of my twitter friends is teaching free online Zumba (Zoom-ba, lol) and I did it yesterday and gotta say, online zumba is the best way to try it, because only our fish witnessed my disgrace.
Good morning newsletter fam! We are awake and coffee'ing and trying to pretend to work diligently.
This was the first morning I woke up after having had a bad dream about a family member getting sick and then me getting sick and I am really not appreciating the creativity of my brain in this regard. I can already see the usual brand of anxiety dreams turning into plague dreams instead of being unable to catch the bus.
I also like Billy Joel and am unashamed about it. Scenes from an Italian Restaurant and The Downeaster Alexa are possibly my favourites but I am also very attached to A Minor Variation. My dad's band used to do You May Be Right when I was a kid and so I can sing that one all the way through too, since sometimes, at band practice, you hire the bass player's kids to pick up the melody while the singer has a smoke break.
i was just compulsively checking my email before bed (a great habit i hope to cultivate more during the pandemic!!!!!! it's all going great actually and we're fine here!!!) and i'm -so- glad i did. nicole, thank you for this wonderful birthday present.
Has anyone else noticed their mood depends on the weather more often than it normally does? It rained yesterday but the sun is out this morning and I feel like someone just handed me a very cute puppy to pet.
EXTREMELY YES, and same for everyone I've talked to about it. I know someone who found himself feeling glad that the epidemic had peaked and we were all going to be fine, and then realizing that ... no, we're still in exponential growth, but now we're in exponential growth and the sun is out.
Good morning everyone. I would say that everything's going fine except that I have lost the ability to concentrate for more than five minutes at a time and my partner has started coughing. Not alarming at all!!
On the bright side... my college friends and I are gonna watch a movie together next week over Zoom.
Today I am going to watch “My Fair Lady”. Steve fell asleep at 8:30 and I read two complete true crime books between then and midnight and need to do a hard reset.
good reset is good. (I love Audrey Hepburn and will hear nothing against her, but. if I suddenly got a time machine, one of the things I would do first is go back and see Julie Andrews in the original Broadway production.)
Tomorrow is a Tiger King open thread so if you have not yet seen it, it’s probably time. It is a shitshow.
Might be time to power through to the finish for us. We're only getting about an episode a day after we get the kids to bed.
I watched it exclusively to be able to appreciate Gritty's tribute to it: https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://mobile.twitter.com/grittynhl/status/1243559022860668928&ved=2ahUKEwi1ku_otsXoAhW9kHIEHdvYABQQwqsBMAB6BAgJEAQ&usg=AOvVaw1I7hpspmloJDtv-iFCwtml&cshid=1585682413592
Thank you for linking to your C&F column because HOLY SHIT how clueless are those parents who move TWICE A YEAR FOR THE HUSBAND'S JOB?! Were they a child before they had 4+ of them?! The cheery tone of "what can I do to negate the effects". Honey. STAHHHP.
(as for the husband... I would bet good money there is a whoooole can of controlling worms under there).
THEY CANNOT READ, and they want more!
And it "wouldn't be good" for THE HUSBAND to change this arrangement...?! 1 husband v 4 kids + 1 wife... I've only been a parent for a short time but to me those sums do themselves...
Thank you for your answer to that one, Nicole. It sounded so similar to my childhood that I genuinely wondered if the dad was in the same industry as my dad. We did not move QUITE as much (I'd been to 6 schools by 6th grade, including the same school twice, because I went to the same school for 3rd and 5th grades but a different one for 4th!!) but it's still something that throws the occasional hitch in my personality. (My newsletter last week was an essay on my weird fantasy of getting really into dollhouse construction so I can re-create all the houses I briefly thought were my home! very normal!)
Also none of us kids talk to our dad anymore, which is not BECAUSE of the moving, directly, but it's a third variable problem (his narcissism.) Sorry to get very personal in the comments here, but that letter really affected me and I'm really, really glad you set that mom straight!!!
Thank you for sharing this! Definite whiffs of the N off this letter because *his* needs are paramount
Anyhoodle. I have a slight sore throat but we have been social distancing for 2+ weeks over here so (a) hopefully it's not Covid19 and (b) if it is hopefully I haven't infected anyone else. Including the baby. Argh. It'll be grand.
Stahhhp indeed! My parents moved from one school district to another the summer between my 3rd and 4th grade. It was awful going from knowing everyone in my class to being the New Kid. I can't imagine the issues those poor kids have with moving twice a year. Dear sweet Pete on a pogostick! Pick a central location and stay!
My mom was an Army Brat and she was just happy she got to stay in one place for all of high school. I moved exactly once from suburban DC to small town CT in middle school and I still feel weird talking about how devastating it was for me. Inside Out is v on point.
Stop moving the kids is what I'm saying that is SO much moving. Also what company? The only one I can think of that does that is IBM and even then I think it's like one international placement for a few years.
good morning Nicole and gang.
Did you know that the Animals recorded "House of the Rising Sun" in ONE TAKE?
Looking forward to visiting New Orleans again someday.
Hope everyone and their loved ones are well and safe.
WHAT
I did not know that! That is an awesome fact.
Hey friends. I’ve been going through some life events and I would kind of like to throw some of my stress into the ether of internet community and love.
My husband and I separated in August. We have separate apartments but are still theoretically trying to make things work. The year before we separated was really hard, escalating in yelling most nights. This really took a toll on me and I’m starting to feel like myself again finally. But when we see each other now it almost always ends in a fight or hurt feelings. I am finding it difficult to apologize even if I know it’s warranted because so much of that bad year had to do with the idea that I was doing everything wrong and I feel like I’m retroactively validating it. I am exhausted, and as an avid follower of r/rels I know that if I were reading this I would basically be like “get outta there girl” but I am finding that so much harder in practice. Now with Covid and quarantine it’s highlighting how much we still depend on each other for social interaction and emotional support but also realizing that the support I think is there doesn’t really exist in practice anyway. I am le tired.
Thanks for letting me share, and any good thoughts, vibes, or incantations are welcome. Love to you all.
That sounds so stressful and hard even during normal times, and now is not normal times. All the good thoughts!
This is so hard, I am sorry.
The neighborhood listserv is starting to accumulate prayer requests for infected family members in critical condition. :( So far it seems like everyone has a ventilator available to them but it's going to get very ugly. I would dearly appreciate any prayers you can offer for my community.
the letter about the sex ed is. A Lot. and reminds me of so I was around that age during the Clinton scandal and I have a VERY strong memory of my mom asking me if I knew what Oral Sex was and a MORTIFIED me lying and said I did just to end that conversation. (I thought it was phone sex).
Other family sex ed highlights include my mom presenting me (also around this age) with a copy of Our Bodies Ourselves and talking about how important it was to her and to let her know if I had any questions. I love my mom but she is a very blunt person.
When I was nine or so, Mom attempted to have the Talk with me. I looked her in the eye and said, "I'm too young for this."
She left a copy of "What's Happening to My Body" on my bed for me to find instead. We never spoke of anything related to puberty or sex again. (In retrospect, I know that Mom got hit with puberty much younger than I did, and she probably was sure that tampon explanations and bra shopping were right around the corner.)
Nicky, your sign-offs always give me a pep in my step that I need. Also, it feels odd to call you Nicky. I've spent so much time telling my husband "My internet friend Nicole told me to buy [item from Sephora]."
Same here, I feel impertinent.
Nicole yesterday my entire local family (mom, husband, grandparents, great aunt, regular aunt and uncle, both cousins) asked me to lead a conversation about last wishes and deciding who is the designated visitor if someone ends up hospitalized. It was my first day off in a month of responding to this nightmare and I spent an hour and a half on a call planning how everyone wants to die.
Your newsletter is a light in this dark timeline, so thank you for that. And I could use a lot of virtual hugs.
One of my twitter friends is teaching free online Zumba (Zoom-ba, lol) and I did it yesterday and gotta say, online zumba is the best way to try it, because only our fish witnessed my disgrace.
Good morning newsletter fam! We are awake and coffee'ing and trying to pretend to work diligently.
This was the first morning I woke up after having had a bad dream about a family member getting sick and then me getting sick and I am really not appreciating the creativity of my brain in this regard. I can already see the usual brand of anxiety dreams turning into plague dreams instead of being unable to catch the bus.
I also like Billy Joel and am unashamed about it. Scenes from an Italian Restaurant and The Downeaster Alexa are possibly my favourites but I am also very attached to A Minor Variation. My dad's band used to do You May Be Right when I was a kid and so I can sing that one all the way through too, since sometimes, at band practice, you hire the bass player's kids to pick up the melody while the singer has a smoke break.
even rode my motorcycle in the raiiiiiiiin
remember how i found you there, alone in your electric chair? i told you dirty jokes until you smiled.
Say what you will about him, but the man can tell a story in song lyrics.
i was just compulsively checking my email before bed (a great habit i hope to cultivate more during the pandemic!!!!!! it's all going great actually and we're fine here!!!) and i'm -so- glad i did. nicole, thank you for this wonderful birthday present.
Happy birthday!
Happy Birthday!
Happy birthday!
Finally, the chink in the armor. How DARE Steve.
Has anyone else noticed their mood depends on the weather more often than it normally does? It rained yesterday but the sun is out this morning and I feel like someone just handed me a very cute puppy to pet.
EXTREMELY YES, and same for everyone I've talked to about it. I know someone who found himself feeling glad that the epidemic had peaked and we were all going to be fine, and then realizing that ... no, we're still in exponential growth, but now we're in exponential growth and the sun is out.
That Judy/Barbra duet made me cry.
Yes! Chuckles during the banter and (happy) tears during the song.
Good morning everyone. I would say that everything's going fine except that I have lost the ability to concentrate for more than five minutes at a time and my partner has started coughing. Not alarming at all!!
On the bright side... my college friends and I are gonna watch a movie together next week over Zoom.
My allergies have turned me into a coughing, sneezing mess so we are not leaving the house until I can stop that. It's been very alarming.
My partner is also allergy prone so it is very helpful to remember that it could be just that, thank you!