I'm feeling a bit of survivor guilt because on a personal level, 2019 didn't completely suck? As long as I'm not living through Yet Another Massachusetts Winter (and I put a stop to that in 2019), my life will likely be somewhat better than it has been for the last 10 years or so.
Hope everyone survived the fireworks last night, if there were fireworks where you live. (There were fireworks right on my street from midnight till about quarter of one.)
- went on an excellent two week vacation with my partner of 9 years
- joined my synagogue board of directors
- became chair of the search committee for my synagogue's next rabbi
- completed my master's degree, which I have been working on online for the past 2.5 years
- took care of my younger sister who has a neuro disability and is struggling to figure out her own adulthood
- worked full time at a high enough level that I was promoted two steps and given a significant raise
It was a very busy and VERY PRODUCTIVE year. It's really really fucking surreal to be kicking ass while the world falls apart around me. I also feel guilty and lonely about talking about it.
It's hard watching folks around you struggle while things are going well for you ... but I think it's important to be public about our successes as non-men, no matter what. Congratulations on a great year and a lot of hard work.
2019 was a good year for me too. It was a sound, safe, productive year. My family thrived, my bills were paid, we took a couple family vacations, we spent a lot of time together. My sister moved close to me which has been amazing. I've seen her and her family more in the last 6 months than I did in the combined five years prior. I am thankful and grateful and I hope 2020 brings the broader world more peace, equality and prosperity.
I can’t get over that firefighter AITA. From the very beginning of the story he had only himself and his own preferences in mind.
Dude should have gone to the hospital the moment he knew his wife was there. Why did he decide to hang around the station? He should have been there for his wife throughout her labor, not waiting because “it will be a while.”
And even now, after several days of reflecting, it doesn’t seem to occur to him that the issue isn’t missing the moment his child entered the world (although that is huge!), the issue is that his wife needed him to be there for her and he chose to prioritize his own comfort and ego over her needs. He still doesn’t even realize she had needs! Or how profoundly he let her down.
In comments he says that his wife used to be a firefighter too, but quit after some traumatic experiences. So he left her alone, with no word that he wouldn’t be there, and she knew he was in harm’s way the whole time. Just awful. That poor woman.
He was smart enough not to say it, but he clearly thinks that she was overreacting the entire time and now that they have a living child expects to never hear about their dead babies again. He sees these pregnancies as something foisted upon him that he suffered through
My mom is kind of obsessed with the dna tests, got hers, and gives them as gifts. I refused her offer of getting one. It’s strange. The only good thing to come out of this is a person who tells you about their Native American grandmother? Tested as no native ancestry.
I'm feeling a bit of survivor guilt because on a personal level, 2019 didn't completely suck? As long as I'm not living through Yet Another Massachusetts Winter (and I put a stop to that in 2019), my life will likely be somewhat better than it has been for the last 10 years or so.
Hope everyone survived the fireworks last night, if there were fireworks where you live. (There were fireworks right on my street from midnight till about quarter of one.)
In 2019, I:
- achieved a professional certification
- went on an excellent two week vacation with my partner of 9 years
- joined my synagogue board of directors
- became chair of the search committee for my synagogue's next rabbi
- completed my master's degree, which I have been working on online for the past 2.5 years
- took care of my younger sister who has a neuro disability and is struggling to figure out her own adulthood
- worked full time at a high enough level that I was promoted two steps and given a significant raise
It was a very busy and VERY PRODUCTIVE year. It's really really fucking surreal to be kicking ass while the world falls apart around me. I also feel guilty and lonely about talking about it.
I am genuinely joyful for you! And your INCREDIBLE work ethic.
Thank you! It's been so much.
It's hard watching folks around you struggle while things are going well for you ... but I think it's important to be public about our successes as non-men, no matter what. Congratulations on a great year and a lot of hard work.
2019 was a good year for me too. It was a sound, safe, productive year. My family thrived, my bills were paid, we took a couple family vacations, we spent a lot of time together. My sister moved close to me which has been amazing. I've seen her and her family more in the last 6 months than I did in the combined five years prior. I am thankful and grateful and I hope 2020 brings the broader world more peace, equality and prosperity.
I can’t get over that firefighter AITA. From the very beginning of the story he had only himself and his own preferences in mind.
Dude should have gone to the hospital the moment he knew his wife was there. Why did he decide to hang around the station? He should have been there for his wife throughout her labor, not waiting because “it will be a while.”
And even now, after several days of reflecting, it doesn’t seem to occur to him that the issue isn’t missing the moment his child entered the world (although that is huge!), the issue is that his wife needed him to be there for her and he chose to prioritize his own comfort and ego over her needs. He still doesn’t even realize she had needs! Or how profoundly he let her down.
In comments he says that his wife used to be a firefighter too, but quit after some traumatic experiences. So he left her alone, with no word that he wouldn’t be there, and she knew he was in harm’s way the whole time. Just awful. That poor woman.
He was smart enough not to say it, but he clearly thinks that she was overreacting the entire time and now that they have a living child expects to never hear about their dead babies again. He sees these pregnancies as something foisted upon him that he suffered through
My mom is kind of obsessed with the dna tests, got hers, and gives them as gifts. I refused her offer of getting one. It’s strange. The only good thing to come out of this is a person who tells you about their Native American grandmother? Tested as no native ancestry.
Oh man. Those are two @$$holes. Wow.